Equal Pay Day Tips for Working Women

Ladies, today we celebrate a great milestone. As of April 12, 2011, we have officially caught up to what our male counterparts earned in 2010. It only took us an extra 102 days! Personally, I'm feeling as empowered as a vintage Virginia Slims ad, but a lot of people are asking why, in the year 2011, such a large wage gap - 77 cents for women compared to each $1 earned by men - still exists.

Well, I'm here to tell you it's definitely not about sexism! Women of America, you're doing the same work but making less than your male counterparts because you just don't have their workplace savvy. Luckily there's a lot of research out there about what women can do to improve their standing in the professional world, and I've compiled a handy guide for you. Whether you're just starting your career or already pressed firmly against that glass ceiling, there's something here for everyone.

Don't choose a profession that is female-dominated. The wages tend to be depressed already. I mean, caring for children? Teaching? Girly stuff. You need to pick a man-tested, man-approved field if you want to rake in a decent salary.

But if you're one of the few women in a male-dominated profession, as there will probably be some limits to your advancement because you may be seen as "unsociable and difficult to work with." A 2004 study in the Journal of Applied Psychology found "successful women were characterized as more selfish, manipulative and untrustworthy - your typical constellation of 'bitchy' characteristics," according to one researcher.

Get educated. We all know that advanced degrees are one way to ensure you'll earn an advanced salary.

But don't expect that fancy book-learning to correlate with higher pay. According to a White House report released last month, in 2009 women earned about 75 percent as much as their male counterparts at all levels of education.

Be sure to negotiate. How will you earn more money if you don't ask for it?

But don't negotiate too hard, lest you be seen as a total harpy. "People found that to be way too aggressive," economist Linda Babcock told NPR in February. "She was successful in getting the money, but people did not like her. They thought she was too demanding. And this can have real consequences for a woman's career."

Be more cutthroat. The working world rewards go-getters and alphas, and nice gals finish last. Toughen up and maybe you'll get that corner office!

But don't, like, be a ball-busting bitch once you get there. Studies have shown that employees, both male and female, are wary of working for high-achieving women. And since only 20 percent of professional leaders are women, you've got to represent your whole gender. Do us all a favor and don't make all of your employees hate you.

Maintain your appearance, especially if you are over the age of 30. Put on some lipstick and a nice pair of heels. Just because you're one of the boys doesn't mean you should wear what they do.

Use your natural nurturing skills to your advantage. Conservative author Christina Hoff Sommers has written that "a practical, responsible femininity could be a force for good in the world beyond the family, through charitable works and more enlightened politics and government."

But don't expect to actually raise a child and keep your career on track. Breast pumps and salary bumps are mutually exclusive. Research shows that, regardless of performance, women with children are seen as less competent and less committed to work. They're also less likely to be promoted. And in one survey, participants said they would offer working mothers wages an average of $13,000 lower than wages for fathers.

Get comfortable on the golf course. Know your way around a humidor. Suggest a post-work happy hour at the local strip club. The real deals all happen outside the workplace, you know.

But don't be too uptight about it when those outside-the-workplace meetings happen in places that still explicitly ban you.

Congratulations! If you've followed these easy tips, you are now a successful, self-determined, professional woman! Your friends always said you were the Miranda, and now you've got the salary to prove it. You are challenged and fulfilled at work! You probably make more than most men you know!

Taken from good.is  Written by Ann Friedman

10 Tips for Women in Business to Achieve Their Goals

Goals help you map out events so that you can achieve what you want in life and business. They can also give you focus, which increases your chances for success. When you achieve one of your business goals, it empowers you, giving you the momentum to become more successful. Momentum is a key element for women achieving their business goals. It keeps you moving toward your objective.

Achieving your business goals involves taking action steps to ensure that you successfully attain them. The process requires that you set your goals and then plan out strategies for achieving them. The following 10 tips can help you do just that:

1. Set your goals. To begin the process of achieving your goals, you must first map out where you want to go. You can achieve this be setting your goals. Your business goals should be specific, have time frames, and be attainable by you.
2. Actively pursue your goals. Take some time to think about every specific action step you need to take to reach each of your business goals. Utilize your skills and resources to their fullest. Brainstorm all the possible avenues you can take to achieve your goals. Be proactive rather than passive.
3. Create goal-achieving plans. You need to create a step-by-step plan for each one of your business goals. The more specific and detailed you are in your planning, the better your chances for successfully achieving the goal. One method women can use involves listing five practical steps for achieving each of their goals.
4. Make a daily to-do list. A daily to-do list helps you organize your day so that you accomplish what you need to achieve your business goals. This list contains the things you need to do daily. At the beginning of each business day, examine what you need to accomplish. Focus and direct your energies toward your goals.
5. Regularly evaluate your progress. If your business goals are your destination points, you need to regularly evaluate how far you have moved toward them. Did you meet your expectations? What are you doing right? What are you doing wrong? Apply the 80/20 rule and spend your time more wisely in order to move more effectively toward your goals.
6. Networking. Building a business network is an important part of achieving your goals. Every time you make a contact you open another doorway of opportunity. Your contacts become possible customers, employers, employees, and avenues to other exciting places with higher earnings. The wider and better maintained your network, the better your chances for success.
7. Affirmations and visualizations. Create affirmations that move you toward your business goals. If your goal is getting more sales for your business, write out an affirmation such as "Today and everyday I will increase the sales in my business." Visualize in your mind the success of your goals. Spend at least 10 minutes every day visualizing your success.For optimum results, post your affirmation around you workspace and read it aloud a minimum of eight times a day for at least 21 days.
8. Focus on what works for you. Play toward your natural inclinations. This means you need to focus on what you do well and work on the rest of your skills that are pertinent to your business. Make an effort to delegate tasks you don't know how to do to others who have an expertise in them.
9. Be prepared for the unexpected. Successful business women prepare for every eventuality that might happen. Like a fire drill. You need to have a plan for particular situations. By adapting to every situation, you make it an opportunity rather than a problem.
10. Evolve your goals. You are a dynamic person who is continually changing as the world around you changes. As such, you need to evolve your goals to match the changes in yourself and your environment. As a business woman, staying ahead of trends can mean a lot to your success. When you achieve your goals, you need to celebrate your success. This gives you the momentum to take the action steps necessary to achieve your next business goal.

Taken from allbusiness.com  

6 Reasons Working Mothers Say Thanks

Working mothers' thanks go to their kids' teachers, the neighbors, the babysitter and the many other people who keep our lives manageable. But sometimes working mothers say thanks simply for being able to work outside the home while also raising children.

That's not to say that working mothers are better off than stay-at-home moms. Every parent has the prerogative to choose the path that's best for her family, and the right to make that decision without being judged. Sta-at-home moms deserve our respect and admiration for the difficult course they've chosen and sacrifices they make.

As for working mothers, we've made our own tradeoffs by accepting less time with our family in exchange for a career. But let's focus on the positive. Here are 6 good reasons to shrug off the guilt and be grateful you're a working mother.

Working Mothers Get Time Alone

Stay-at-home moms, especially of babies and toddlers, rarely enjoy a moment's peace. They may not even be able to go to the bathroom alone. Working mothers get time away from their family, to think in quiet and to focus on something other than the relentless drumbeat of children's needs. Even working mothers in jobs that involve serving customers may find that their kids' demands are the most relentless. Every working mother who has enjoyed a peaceful cup of coffee at work knows what I'm talking about. A lunch break spent running errands or getting a hair cut can still be a welcome break from children.

Working Mothers Enjoy Adult Interaction

We all love our kids. We enjoy talking with other moms about them and their foibles. But it's nice to have a built-in break from the world of children, even if it means talking about overdue reports, sales projections and upcoming presentations. Even better is the opportunity to chat with co-workers about politics, sports, current events or the latest blockbuster movie. Potty training and camp schedules can drive you crazy if you don't have any other topics of conversation. (This is not to say that stay-at-home moms are incapable of discussing weighty topics - just that when you interact with other adults in a child-free zone, it's a natural outcome.)

Work Gives You an Identity Beyond "Mom"

Being a mother is our most important job. But it can be overwhelming if it's out only one. Working mothers get to have an identity separate from being "mom." After all, parenthood is filled with tasks that must be repeated multiple times a day. You dress the kid, her clothes get dirty, you have to wash them. You feed the kid, clean the dishes and then he's hungry again. It can feel endless. At work there may be plenty of mundane chores. But you also have projects with a beginning and an end, something you can point to with pride and say, "I did that!" You use your brain for challenges beyond figuring out the carpool schedule. Notice those accomplishments and document them to remind yourself (and your boss) that you are a talented contributor to your workplace.

Working Mothers Earn a Pay Check

It doesn't make you greedy to relish the weekly or monthly pay check you bring home. That money feeds and clothes your family, and helps provide for financial security in the future. Like it or not, our society runs on money and recognizes it as proof of accomplishment. If you make choice to give up that pay check, you are opening your family to the risk of financial instability down the road. Hopefully, we are all putting a little money into a college savings fund and a retirement fund. Both of those funds will help our children with the education they will receive and freedom from supporting elderly parents. For many working mothers, the pay check provides some of the extras in life, whether a regular dinner out, nice vacations or extracurricular activities for the kids. And even those in the most loving marriage recognize that earning money puts them on equal footing with their husband and protects them in case the marriage ends.

Working Mothers Set an Example

As a mother of daughters, I am keenly aware that my life choices will be their first model when they venture out into the world. They may choose differently, but their point of comparison will be the decisions I made about my career and family. So while I hope they understand that family is my top priority, I also love that they see me having a professional life that is rewarding and important. It's healthy for children not to be the only focus of their mom's life - that's way too much pressure. They need the room to make mistakes and learn from them without mom always hovering nearby. The same holds true for moms and boys. If boys are going to grow up to respect women as equal contributors to the workplace, it helps for them to see their mom in that role.

Our Children Learn Independence

Someone recently asked me why daycare children are so confident and outgoing. While I don't feel that statement is universally true, I do believe that being in child care helps kids to develop independence and confidence. Every day they separate from their moms and dads, and things turn out okay. It's wonderful to see children develop loving relationships with their caregivers, and learn different things from them than they would have learned from their parents. Exposure to multiple perspectives - both caregivers and other kids - makes children more resilient and able to interact with a range of people as they grow up. That's a recipe for success in life.

Taken from about.com  Written by Katherine Lewis

10 Things Science Says Will Make You Happy

In the last few years, psychologists and researchers have been digging up hard data on a question previously left to philosophers: What makes us happy? Researchers have studied people all over the world to find out how things like money, attitude, culture, memory, health, altruism, and our day-to-day habits affect our well-being. The emerging field of positive psychology is bursting with new findings that suggest your actions can have a significant effect on your happiness and satisfaction with life. Here are 10 scientifically proven strategies for getting happy.

1. Savor everyday moments.
2. Avoid comparisons
3. Put money low on the list
4. Have meaningful goals
5. Take initiative at work
6. Make friends, treasure family
7. Smile even when you don't feel like it
8. Say thank you like you mean it
9. Get out and exercise
10. Give it away, give it away now

Taken from yesmagazine.org

Ending Procrastination

Maybe you tell yourself you perform better under pressure. Or that the work you do when you're not feeling in the mood to work isn't very good. Or you think that you can't do anything well unless you're feeling at the top of your form.

Uh-oh, you've got the earmarks of a procrastinator. Of course, you've got lots of company. Twenty percent of people identify themselves as chronic procrastinators. These are people who don't pay their bills on time, who miss opportunities for buying tickets to concerts, who leave Christmas shopping until Christmas Eve. Let's not even talk about income taxes!

College seems to bring out the procrastination in people. In the college setting, up to 70% of student identify themselves as procrastinators.

Of course, it won't help you get things done any faster to know that procrastination isn't good for your health. But putting things off creates higher levels of stress and sends those stress hormones coursing through your body, wearing it out faster. And it puts you at risk for poor health because you're just as likely to delay seeking treatment for medical problems as you are to delay everything else.

Procrastination actually weakens your immune system. It keeps you awake at night. And it doesn't do a thing for your relationships either. It makes loved ones resentful, because it shifts the burden of responsibilities to them.

Procrastinators are made and not born. That's both the good news and the bad news. Good because it's a learned response, and what's learned can be unlearned. The bad news is that while it's possible to change, it takes a lot of psychic energy and you don't necessarily feel transformed internally.

You should know that some people who think of themselves as procrastinators really aren't. In a world of unending deadlines, they just put too many things on their "To Do" list. They're not avoiding tasks, the mark of a bona fide procrastinator; they're getting things done, just not as many as they would like.

It's easy to tell whether you're a real procrastinator. According to Joseph Ferrari, PhD, associate professor of psychology at De Paul University in Chicago, real procrastinators tell themselves these five lies:

• They overestimate the time they have left to perform tasks.
• They underestimate the time it takes to complete tasks.
• They overestimate how motivated they will feel the next day, the next week, the next month - whenever they are putting things off to.
• They mistakenly think that succeeding at a task requires that they feel like doing it.
• They mistakenly believe that working when not in the mood is suboptimal.

Procrastinators also actively look for distractions, especially ones that don't take heavy-duty commitment on their part. Checking email is just about tailor-made for this purpose. The dirty little secret is that procrastinators distract themselves as a way of regulating their own emotions, such as fear of failure.

So face it. Some tasks are never going to be thigh-slappers no matter how long they marinate on your desk. You've got to do them now!

How to tackle procrastination? Dr Ferrari recommends these strategies for reducing procrastination:

1. Make a list of everything you have to do.
2. Write a statement of intention.
3. Set realistic goals.
4. Break it down into specific tasks.
5. Make your task meaningful.
6. Promise yourself a reward.
7. Eliminate tasks you never plan to do. Be honest!
8. Estimate the amount of time you think it will take you to complete a task. Then increase the amount by 100%.

Taken from psychologytoday.com  Written by Hara Marano

The Goals that Guide Us

"Not all who wander are lost," they say, but for the great majority of us, having a road map for the future is a key element to sell-being and success, however we choose to define it. This means setting goals for ourselves, and finding ways to achieve them. If you're a wanderer, it might be time to realize the boundless utility of setting goals.

It's simply a fact: when people have goals to guide them, they are happier and achieve more than they would without having them. It's a brain thing. Achieving a goal you've set produces dopamine, a neurotransmitter responsible for feelings of pleasure. Reciprocally, dopamine activates neural circuitry that makes you eager to pursue new challenges.

Goals provide focus. With no guiding vision or plan, people tend to drift. Goals provide a measuring stick for progress. Goals enhance productivity. They bolster self-esteem. And most of all, goals increase commitment, so you're more likely to achieve whatever you set out to conquer.

While it's not a good idea to try to change everything at once, you can set goals in virtually any domain of your life, from your wardrobe to your church to your workplace.

Of course, a thousand mile journey starts with the first small step. And whether we're embarking on the long trek of a mid-life career switch or the walk to the bedroom to finally organize that closet, it can be hard to gather up the motivation to make that initial step. While setting goals is in itself self-motivating, sometimes it's just not enough. Here are some tried-and-true ways you can begin to move toward achieving your goals, and maintain resolve when the going gets rough.

• Put your goals in writing. The act of writing down what you are going to do is a strong motivator. Writing down goals prevents you from leaving your goals vague. Be specific. Use action verbs. Let your goals have measurable outcomes. Specify completion dates. Also record what your reward will be for achieving the goal. Make a contract with yourself, then read it every morning and night. This will help you to be more committed to your goal as each day passes. And while you've got the pen in your hand...
• Make a list of obstacles. Think of everything that might stand in your way. Then decide what you can do about each obstacle. Design a plan to reduce the influence of each obstacle and increase the chances you will be successful in reaching your goal.
• List the benefits of achieving your goal. Knowing exactly what you will gain from reaching your goal is a strong motivator. Keeping my checkbook balanced will give me more spending money on the weekends. Walking a mile every morning will help me stay focused at work.
• Identify subgoals. Break down complicated plans into manageable chunks. Be specific about what has to be accomplished. Decide what you are going to do, and when. Make sure each step is challenging but achievable, and that you have a complete plan of action. Then write it on your calendar and review it regularly.
• Learn what you need to learn. If information or skill is keeping you from achieving your goals, determine ways to fill in the gaps, and build this into your action plan. Be willing to study and work hard to reach your goals. Think about how much time and effort will be required, and ask yourself whether you are really willing and able to do what is necessary. It is better to adjust your goals or your timetable than to proceed with a plan that is unrealistic.
• Enlist the help of others. Find someone, a coworker or friend, with whom you share a common goal. Get someone to go to the gym with you, or to quit smoking with you, or to share healthy meals with you. A partner can help you stay committed and motivated. Look for role models, people who have already achieved the goals you seek to reach. Ask them for advice and suggestions. Find out how they got where they are, and incorporate what you learn into your plan.
• Visualize yourself having achieved each of your goals. The more real you can make your visualization, the better. Find a quiet place, visualize, write down your experiences afterward. Go through magazines and cut out pictures that represent your goal, then put them around the house. Provide constant reminders to yourself about what you're working towards. Describe your ideal life in the future. Write a few paragraphs describing what you have accomplished, and how your life is better as a result. Use the present tense as if it is happening right here, right now. This is another way of making your vision real.
• Get organized. When you are prepared and organized, you will feel better about your ability to reach your goals. Having information scattered in too many places makes you feel out of control and undermines motivation. Set up a filing system, set aside your workout clothes.
• Reward yourself each step of the way. Let yourself feel good about the progress you've made. Treat yourself to rewards that will give you a lift as you accomplish each subgoal on your road to success.

Taken from psychologytoday.com  Written by Hara Marano

Down But Not Out

So you just got fired? Don't wallow in misery. You may be the new CEO of the next biggest thing. Licking your wounds over a bitter divorce? You may end up meeting the love of your life - today. So don't sit around. You may meet him on a plane or even at a grocery store. In fact, a lot of good can come out of a big disappointment. Setbacks actually force us to take risks, learn and grow.

In every part of life - romance, work, family - stuff happens. And these disappointments can indeed set you back, make you feel anxious and fearful. In moving through the recovery process, you may likely feel a range of emotions including anger, anxiety, confusion, low self-esteem and self-doubt. These represent stages of response and cannot be rushed. But over time you will begin to feel acceptance and hopefulness. When you let go of the past, you will experience increased self-esteem and renewed optimism.

But how do you get there? Terri Needels, PhD, a clinical psychologist in Honolulu, has some words of advice: "Don't focus on what you lost or what didn't work. You have to rewrite your script and see yourself differently - such as seeing yourself with another person, or at another job."

Easier said than done. Some people flounder in frustration and blame after a disappointment. Worse, some people fall into deep depression. But then again others bounce back quickly and with energy. While you can argue that these people may well be born more resilient, resilience can certainly be learned. Practice and experience help. Most successful people have had hard their hard knocks, but they recover and move on. They, in fact, see disappointment as a prospect for something new. "Big losses provide the biggest opportunities for change," says Needels. "They make a person more open to trying new things."

Here are a few tips to learn how you can become more resilient and overcome life's big disappointments:

• Accept the setback. Know that setbacks happen to everyone. And realize that you may never understand what happened.
• Face your fears. It's normal to feel insecure, but don't cower and avoid uncertainty.
• Be patient. Reflect and think about what you plan to do; but don't rush, it will only aggravate the process.
• Go beyond your comfort zone. Take risks. Go after that job you think you can't do, doing so will build self-esteem and resilience.
• Find your hero. Think about people who have survived adversity. Use them as your role models.
• Know what you want. If you have goals, it's easier to make plans and move forward.
• Be a problem-solver. Don't be the victim, instead learn to behave proactively.
• One step at a time. To move forward, the enormity of the task (such as finding a new job) may seem insurmountable. Focus on each step you must take, not the entire undertaking.
• Seek support. Talk to friends, family or a therapist.
• Be kind to yourself. Disappointments are a source of stress, so exercise, eat right and get rest.

Taken from psychologytoday.com  Written by Lybi Ma